oh my! hi! im on a tight time limit here so i cant get my full thoughts out but- the new tadc episode made me cry real big girl tears and i have never been more worried in my life, i think. oh no jax oh no ragatha ohhhhhhhhhhh man. truly if umm if i were to reccommend you pick a source to be from i think minewould be ........ number -600 on the list, don't do it okjay? ah and zooble...if i could anime nosebleed right now i would. oh, and the new psg episode was really good too. i love polyurethane, he is super cute, the sub writers were having a good time with those angel boys ... okay bye! i'll be back tomorrow with a better post i hope
edit on the next day: i think i'll just write here instead of making a new post. (α΅βαβ) i have a lot to say... okay um well first, can i just say i hate that i have to watch that? well i don't hate it... it's a good show but i feel like a voyeur. also i hate gaining lore in real time. really first world problems right now but it's a weird feeling (-βΏ-") but yeah, i shouldn't have seen half of the stuff in that ep, definitely not! but i saw it so here we are! my heart rate went up a concerning amount during some scenes. it really sucks you in. like, the show i mean, at least for me. which is both good and bad because i miss...some people (whenever zooble gets screentime i think i gain a few years on my lifespan), but it's also bad because well! i mean that's obvious right. uhh what was i gonna say... i had a lot of thoughts and they are gonnneee... well i was going to talk a little bit about my feelings about certain people from source but then i decided that random strangers don't need to know that. random strangers already know way too much about me, this is the horror of being a fictive. seriously. horrifying. (β₯οΉβ₯) i also wanted to talk about the system a little bit. and how what jax said about archetypes---was something i think we struggled with for a little while at least, until i maybe, tried to stop it? a little? i don't know. i was seen as one of the 'sad one's and also the 'one that is scared of violence and sex and anything that isn't pumped full of glitter' and i think. for a while i tried to shove myself into those boxes, even though they were a little bit silly! and by for a while i mean, around 6 months! ( ;Β΄ - `;) i never really felt like a person. i felt like ... a mask! which is not great. i hate that. but... okay don't laugh, but i think PSG actually helped with that a lot??? it still has cute girls and stuff but they're also... hot and titillating and i like that. all of that. i think a part of me might have felt a little bad but...i got really bitter and i stopped feeling bad about being myself, for a bit. though now that i'm like... this, i feel like i lost something, so can labubu gangle win, no, labubu gangle can't win but maybe one day she will right? (ΛΕ_Ε) oh, not that i don't like pink and glitter and girly things. sometimes i get misgendered by the sysmates on accident and it is really funny i guess that's what happens when youre a girl in a boy brain? in a girl body but its a boy body? what is my life. oh, and, why do people think source-me is a guy ??? like, often...??? the singlet also thought i was a guy back when the pilot was the only episode out and i am really curious as to what about me reads as 'man' but... oh well... it is funny to me though. (also i will forever be curious about what the singlet saw in me for me to be their 'favorite character' before episode 4 came out? i guess its flattering but...)
okay i'm talking too much! bye! i think i'm going to hijack one of peridot's projects. we'll see though. βΈ(ο½‘Λ α΅ Λ )βΈβ‘